Month: August 2018

I’ve bumped into some grumpy moments the past week so I think making a gratitude list will remind me of all that I have. If it was Thanksgiving, it would be the one where your alcoholic uncle shows up late and proceeds to breathe whisky-fumes all over the overcooked turkey while the rest of your family barks at one another and judges each other’s accomplishments for the past year.

Meanwhile, you’ll be sitting on the couch while staring at the television. The Macy’s parade will be on. You’ll be grateful for something on which to focus.

Gratitude:

1. I am really grateful for my own integrity. I’ve bumped into a couple of people in the last week who are grown-ass adults who operate with zero personal integrity and I was so grossed out. I am grateful that I try to do the right thing even when nobody is looking and that I want to be able to look my authentic self in the mirror every night without a bunch of self-concocted lies and bullshit stories.
2. I am also really grateful that I recognize when I am being self-righteous (see above) and can have a good laugh at myself. Usually if I am being self-righteous it’s because I really want to tell someone to go fuck themselves but feel like it’s beneath me.
3. I am grateful for my little condo. It’s not huge, about 950 square feet, but plenty big enough for me to spread out my art projects or do yoga or wander from room to room looking for what needs cleaning.
4. I am grateful that I have a full life. I’m in love. I have a career. I have hobbies. I have a lot of friends. I make my own money. I pay my own bills. I travel. I have side hustles. I drink expensive wine when I want. I buy shoes I don’t need. I have enough to donate fairly regularly. I have a great dog. My car is dependable. I’m happy.
5. I am grateful that I am still standing after a divorce, a move, a near-miss layoff at work, the death of my best friend, the death of my Grandfather, and about a billion other things I cannot list. I’m still here with my sturdy backbone in place with the road bruises and scrapes to prove what I’ve been through. I’m here and my life did not fall apart. Because that is not how I do things. Ever.

Signing off for now,

Bad Bitch with a Heart of Fire.

I’ve felt cruddy for the last week so I’ve spent my time window-shopping for various leopard print boots, leopard print jeans, leopard print purses, and I even found a leopard print phone cover if I want to pay $30 and wait 4 – 6 weeks for delivery from China.

I don’t do well when I have to be idle due to my body not cooperating. I have things to do, books to read, people to talk to, and I am just too exhausted for any of it. So I’m hiding on Poshmark. And Nordstrom Rack. And Amazon. And and and.

Eleven days until I see my love again. We never go more than a month without seeing one another and we will be pushing 25 days when we meet next week. We will be holed up in a suite in Buttfuck, Mississippi in a hot tub built for two with our dogs, some adult beverages, and nothing but time. I feel certain I will come home completely exhausted for all the right reasons.

In the meantime, I’ll be getting my nails done and trying to get my mutant flu under control and picking out my cutest fishnets and dresses. Because I deserve to feel sexy and JD deserves a nicely-wrapped package. <3

 

I always have such big plans for Friday nights. Usually while I’m at work during the afternoon, I’ll proclaim to myself that when I get home I will walk the dog, go to yoga, treat myself to a good dinner, maybe meet up with friends for cocktails, and get to bed at a decent hour.

Instead I normally do what I did tonight which is come home completely exhausted, walk the dog for a lot shorter time than she actually deserves, order in Chinese or rummage for cheese and crackers in my barren fridge, and stay up way too late yammering with JD on FaceTime before eventually working late into the night on various web projects.

I’ll probably go to bed around 4am after sipping kombucha all night and kick my own ass for getting up too late for the “gentle” yoga class tomorrow morning.

I’m a glamorous bitch. What can I say?